The treatment of abandonment anxiety with MDMA and LSD

A woman in her mid-twenties with insecurity and abandonment-related anxiety, intensified after a breakup, underwent a 1.5-year therapeutic process combining Internal Family Systems (IFS) methodology with MDMA and LSD. She attended thirteen therapist-led sessions, eighteen unsupervised self-treatments, and weekly IFS-only sessions. High doses were used (120-400 mg MDMA, 400-600 µg LSD). A pivotal experience was reliving her birth trauma, which she described as aligning with Stanislav Grof's model, revealing abandonment as a core organizing theme. She resolved her fear of abandonment, stopped self-blame, and experienced 'grace.' The process remained ongoing, with each session yielding further benefits.

Study at a glance

Abstract

This retrospective study presents the case of a young woman in her mid-twenties who suffered from insecurity and abandonment-related anxiety, which intensified after a breakup of her relationship. Her parents' alcoholism and schizophrenia, as well as emotional and physical violence, had been a part of her childhood, but they had appeared 'normal' to her. Her parents and relatives had not benefited from conventional therapies, which led her to conclude that they would not benefit her either. A friend introduced her to psychedelics, which she initially found strange. She participated in a few psilocybin mushroom ceremonies but felt that there was a lack of supportive structure between ceremonies. Subsequently, she found a therapist who utilized Internal Family Systems (IFS) methodology, MDMA, and LSD. In the course of 1.5 years, she attended thirteen sessions with a therapist, eighteen unsupervised self-treatment sessions, and almost weekly additional IFS-only sessions. In the beginning, MDMA was utilized in the sessions; later, it was replaced by LSD. The dosages were relatively high (120-400 mg of MDMA, or 400-600 µg of LSD). The most important experience was a reliving of her birth trauma. She described it as perfectly aligned with the model presented by Stanislav Grof. Its essence was the experience of abandonment, which represented a core around which her whole life had been organized. Becoming conscious of this core made her life history appear understandable and explainable. Typical emotions to process had included deep sorrow and feelings of betrayal. She considered that the process had benefited her enormously, especially because the therapist had extensive personal experience of these medicines as well as the same psychedelic states and types of experience. The therapist had thus been able to provide a clear 'route map' within which her experiences fit. She had resolved her fear of abandonment, ceased to blame herself for her past, and experienced 'grace'. She found that many of her experiences represented allegories of events found in the Bible and religious art. The healing process was still ongoing, with each session producing additional benefits. She considered the process so interesting that she intended to continue it for the rest of her life. Her aim was to stop further transmission of transgenerational trauma. She stated that everyone should go through a similar process.